A
person cheating on a significant other is nothing new, but contrary to
popular belief, men are not necessarily the worst offenders. Women cheat
on men too, and the damage that is inflicted on a relationship is deep
and long-lasting. Trust is fragile, and when trust is broken it can be
glued together, but fine cracks will always remain. The harm that
cheating causes spreads like cancer, and if the issue is laid to rest by
the offender and is not open for discussion, wounds caused by a genuine
lack of trust will continue to fester and eventually destroy the
relationship.
It is difficult to trust a cheater, even when all
seems well. As the dust finally settles and forgiveness has been
granted, the person who was cheated on will have more time to reflect.
Even though the cheater seemed to be forgiven at the time, it is
possible that the one who was cheated on will change their mind. Whether
a person is a perpetrator or a victim of cheating, it is important to
remember the past, or the relationship might not have a future.
Will I Ever Be Trusted Again?
This is a question that often comes to mind after being caught cheating on a spouse or a significant other. The cheater sometimes decides the relationship is not worth saving or working on because he or she will never have their partner's trust again. Once broken, trust is very difficult to repair, but it can be repaired with patience and a great deal of time. Because of the issue of trust, the cheater should not be surprised when they are questioned on how their time was spent or how shared money was spent. Mysterious telephone numbers and online activities will also be scrutinized. The cheater gave their significant other a real reason not to trust their motives, and just because they were forgiven does not mean the person they cheated on will ever forget. It can take years to rebuild trust.
The Liar's Punishment and the Cheater
One of my favorite quotes comes from George Bernard Shaw. He said, "The liar's punishment is not that he is not believed, but that he cannot believe anyone else." This is very profound and true. Those who have cheated on a significant other may find themselves wondering if their significant other will someday decide to do the same. A cheater's transgressions can come back to haunt them. Sometimes cheating opens doors that would have otherwise never been opened, and a person who never fully recovered after being cheated on is sometimes better able to justify doing the same. They bide their time as old wounds fester, and they sometimes become exhausted with the relationship because they feel they must constantly check up on the former cheater. No one wants to spend the rest of their life playing detective. As a result of a lack of trust, the relationship eventually crumbles.
The Benefits of Counseling to Gain Back Trust
Many people who choose not to go to counseling after cheating or being cheated on make that decision because they know that talking about the issue cannot take back the act of cheating. Someone who has cheated on a significant other can never take back what happened, but they can help repair trust. Burying the past will not keep it from coming back with a vengeance. The cheater might want the entire issue to just go away, but the person he or she hurt definitely remembers, and even though all might seem fine, the former cheater may never be fully trusted again.
No matter the circumstance, do not pretend that cheating never happened if it in fact did. Instead, welcome the opportunity to go to counseling and discuss the issue. Talking about the problem and having patience while trust is slowly rebuilt is the best way to regain that trust once again - even if you were the one who initially caused the damage.
Will I Ever Be Trusted Again?
This is a question that often comes to mind after being caught cheating on a spouse or a significant other. The cheater sometimes decides the relationship is not worth saving or working on because he or she will never have their partner's trust again. Once broken, trust is very difficult to repair, but it can be repaired with patience and a great deal of time. Because of the issue of trust, the cheater should not be surprised when they are questioned on how their time was spent or how shared money was spent. Mysterious telephone numbers and online activities will also be scrutinized. The cheater gave their significant other a real reason not to trust their motives, and just because they were forgiven does not mean the person they cheated on will ever forget. It can take years to rebuild trust.
The Liar's Punishment and the Cheater
One of my favorite quotes comes from George Bernard Shaw. He said, "The liar's punishment is not that he is not believed, but that he cannot believe anyone else." This is very profound and true. Those who have cheated on a significant other may find themselves wondering if their significant other will someday decide to do the same. A cheater's transgressions can come back to haunt them. Sometimes cheating opens doors that would have otherwise never been opened, and a person who never fully recovered after being cheated on is sometimes better able to justify doing the same. They bide their time as old wounds fester, and they sometimes become exhausted with the relationship because they feel they must constantly check up on the former cheater. No one wants to spend the rest of their life playing detective. As a result of a lack of trust, the relationship eventually crumbles.
The Benefits of Counseling to Gain Back Trust
Many people who choose not to go to counseling after cheating or being cheated on make that decision because they know that talking about the issue cannot take back the act of cheating. Someone who has cheated on a significant other can never take back what happened, but they can help repair trust. Burying the past will not keep it from coming back with a vengeance. The cheater might want the entire issue to just go away, but the person he or she hurt definitely remembers, and even though all might seem fine, the former cheater may never be fully trusted again.
No matter the circumstance, do not pretend that cheating never happened if it in fact did. Instead, welcome the opportunity to go to counseling and discuss the issue. Talking about the problem and having patience while trust is slowly rebuilt is the best way to regain that trust once again - even if you were the one who initially caused the damage.
Published by Crystal Ray
Crystal
Ray is an award-winning freelance writer and professional home
decorator and designer from the Chicago area. She won the People s Media
Award from Associated Content in 2009 as well as numerous award.
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